March 14, 1964
(About a trip to France which Satprem has to make soon.)
… You’ll be able to see your friend B. if you go there.
I’ve lost the habit of contact with others; it’s very rarely that I don’t get tired as soon as I meet someone.
Oh, but it’s more than tired, it’s dazed!
And I’m not used to social life anymore, so I have nothing to say anymore, I’m not there.
I know what you mean!
It’s difficult.
No, that’s good, very good, it SHOULD be that way.
There is only one solution in such cases, the one I have established: the “bath of the Lord.” You make contact within yourself, and you let That flow through you onto others – and then let what happens happen, what does it matter! … It’s very interesting, you feel the Force flowing and flowing and flowing through you – some people can hold on a long time. Over there …
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(Mother stops short and looks for a long time)
No, if I look, it’s terrible.
As long as you don’t look, you can … but if I look, it’s terrible: to be plunged in that…. I don’t think you will be able to stay long. Unless you’re completely alone with your mother in Brittany.
What’s most worrying is people’s friendliness, far more than their adverse reactions.
Oh, yes! That’s much more worrying….
(long silence)
I am not going with a light heart….
I don’t want you to fall ill like the first time. That’s precisely what I am looking at and studying: whether it’s possible to protect you adequately.
But for myself, I know: the first time I went away from here, in 1915 (and I left my psychic being here, I didn’t take it with me – I knew how to do it – I left it behind), in spite of that, in spite of the link, when I came to the Mediterranean, suddenly I fell ill, dreadfully ill. I was constantly ill.
So I know, I know very well!
But even before I did the yoga, as soon as I returned to France from America or Africa, I would suffocate instantly, I couldn’t stay – I never could. I could breathe in Brazil, I could breathe in Africa or even in Guyana, I could breathe in those countries, but in France, in Europe, I couldn’t breathe.
In Europe, yes.
Anyway, I’ll see, mon petit.
Ultimately, it will depend on your receptivity. If you can get used to holding the charge – you understand, to keeping the atmosphere around you, in order to protect yourself.
We’ll see.
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